6/28/09 05:32 pmHI FOLKS, BILLY MAYS HERE TO TELL YOU ABOUT A GREAT NEW DEAL! IT'S BEEN GOING ON FOR THE PAST MONTH NOW, BUT THIS DEAL IS ABOUT TO EXPIRE AND I WANT TO MAKE SURE AS MANY OF YOU GET IN ON IT AS POSSIBLE! I'VE GOT RIGHT HERE ONE BRAND NEW DAVID CARRADINE! LOOK AT HOW WELL IT GETS THOSE STAINS OUT! WOW!
BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE! GET THIS: I'M THROWING IN AN ED MCMAHON! NO JOKE, AN ED MCMAHON! QUITE POSSIBLY THE MOST EFFICIENT SLICER ON THE MARKET TODAY! JUST WATCH AS HE TAKES OUT ONIONS, CARROTS, BROCCOLI, EVEN A CORDLESS PHONE, AND YET STILL KEEPS THE EDGE TO CUT PERFECT TOMATO SLICES! I'M NOT DONE YET, NO SIRREE! I'M GONNA THROW IN YET ANOTHER PACKAGE DEAL - GET MICHAEL JACKSON AND -- NOW WAIT, THIS HAS GOT TO BE A TYPO -- NO, I'M BEING TOLD YOU GET A MICHAEL JACKSON AND A FARRAH FAWCETT! IT WOULD BE SO EASY TO COMPLETELY REDO YOUR ENTIRE RUMPUS ROOM WITH BOTH OF THOSE! JUST IMAGINE THE FRESH SPACKLE JOB! BUT BILLY, HOW MUCH IS THIS AMAZING DEAL? $500? NO! $450? NO! GET THIS, IT'S FOR THE AMAZING INTRODUCTORY PRICE OF TEN EASY MONTHLY PAYMENTS OF $29.99! ACT IN THE NEXT SEVEN MINUTES, AND I'LL EVEN THROW MYSELF INTO THE MIX! THAT'S RIGHT, YOU'LL EVEN GET ME, BILLY MAYS, FOR THAT SAME WONDERFUL PRICE OF $29.99 A MONTH! ORDER NOW! Limited time only, must be 18 years or older to order. Contents may be deceased by time of arrival. Visa or Mastercard only, please. |

